Times gone by

Another major retrospective post is looming, and I have this feeling I might have too many things to write by then. Many, many things have happened from Dec up till now, and I haven't always had the time/chance/feel to write about them coz education tends to get in the way. But that's not the point. The point is that the past 5 months have zoomed by so fast that it makes winter seem short. It's a bit scary, the rate things picked up. In any case, meaningful occurrences deserve some detail, and hence it's time to do some recounting.

Firstly, winter break came (and went too fast), during which I went to Spain + Portugal. [I got to do some more traveling following that, but it seems like I won't get to blog about those until I go back to SG D:] By the time sch started, we were halfway into Jan. The following two weeks or so were a blur of acclimatising back to sch life (somewhat). And then, Jan was gone.

Feb, ah Feb. I think my alcohol consumption went up a few hundredfold in this month (mainly beer), what with the meetups and late-night chats that became crazily frequent and regular. Like I reasoned with my dad (or more so my mum actually), when there are things to celebrate and unhappiness to drown, milk just doesn't cut it. One of those things to celebrate was CNY, which was by far the best part of Feb. Why else would one stay up past 3am on almost every weeknight in a single week. Shag la, but it was fun. And it's prob not an experience I'm ever gonna have again. Then, there was the summer school issue which threw our hearts all round the place and incensed us quite a fair bit. After much angst and confusion, that's been resolved and I've alr set my mind on ponning half a day to fulfil a long-overdue objective.

Feb is special, so it gets one more paragraph. In this month, I was also forced to think about and reconsider what I used to call a friendship. My tolerance is stretchy but it has its bounds. I think the lies (specifically the one concrete lie amidst a cloud of other just barely ambiguous stuff) were the last straw. It's not even crossing a line anymore, it's like falling off a cliff. There's no way back. In recent times whenever we happen to revisit this issue it's always with a tinge of sadness. It's a really regretful thing, for any kind of relationship to deteriorate that much. Enough time has passed for most negative feelings to die down, but pity and regret aside, how can I call a friend someone whom I cannot trust when I turn my back? It is unfortunate, but my defences are up and if the lies continue, I will not hesitate to spill. This was the first life lesson of its kind, and I hope there won't be many repeats to come.

March was a mess of deadlines - labs and coursework all. This is exchange life in ICL and just like that, March slipped away like butter. As much as I was looking forward to the Easter break, the way it seemed to rush up was just scary. [In this month, SG was united by the loss of our founding father LKY. I rmb feeling a kind of detached despondency when we got the news through fb - as Singapore slept, we overseas Singaporeans were the first to know. In that one week, this was all we could talk about, and I was truly amazed by the sheer number of people who cared, here and back home. Underneath all the unwarranted complaining, we are a people with heart. Incidentally, it was also raining in Font during the funeral procession...]

April! Holiday! In fact, March hadn't even ended properly (we left on the night of the last day of school) when I left for Fontainebleau. I really had the time of my life there. And of course the next thing I knew, I was back in London for one week of reality before my next trip up to Italy. A good trip with a good friend, with enough sun and chocolate gelato to keep me happy :) Then (again), back to London for one week of slightly more panicky reality and I was off (again), for a short trip back to where it all began. After an awesomely chill two days in the countryside of Derbyshire, we said goodbye to some ppl whom now consider us as friends. I fully expect it to be a long goodbye, but with hope that we will see them again. That was it, no more trips left to mask the full-blown horror of the exams which started for real at the end of the month. The first paper was for a subject which (1) was a year 3 module (2) we hadn't had foundation for coz we were doing it in parallel with the foundation year 2 module (3) we couldn't attend half the year's lessons for coz of timetable clashes. Just some justification for the fact that I am thoroughly unconfident of passing that particular paper :(

Now it's a bit over one week into May. Other than studying to pass exams in effort not to repeat the traumatic first paper experience, I don't foresee much else happening. I'm still climbing, which is prob the main thing that's different from back in NTU (where passing is not good enough haha). I think I spoiled one of my fingers though... And recently, I suddenly really missed climbing with UMC. Like really badly. Help, I think the exam season is triggering a severe bout of homesickness...

April assortment

So it's the 1st of May (or at least it was, about an hour ago). This means that I'm a good 11 months into my excursion to this side of the world.

I just felt like typing smth before I go to sleep. The past 5 months have flown by, and it feels like not long ago when I was lamenting the fact that I'd still had 7-8 months left before I could go home. Then again, like J said, even though time does fly, there's no doubt upon looking back that we've been away for a very long time. But that's a (long) story for another day.

April deserves a bit of a mention for being the latest month to zip past, but with the distinction of being one of the most enjoyable and meaningful. [It's like Feb but without the angst] Bouldering in Fontainebleau. Sun and gelato in Italy. 2 carefree days in Derbyshire. 2Gs in the air.

It was mildly amusing how each travel period would be separated by increasingly panicky bouts of reality. Thanks exams. But at least I got to fully enjoy those times away. Not to mention the sentimentalism associated with visiting the place where it all began, and the people who have been in that place for ages and ages. And some of whom now see us as friends. I hope it won't be 10 years before we get to see them again.

15 Scientifically Proven Ways to Be Happier
I found myself resonating most with the "Embrace Adversity" part and I don't find it the least bit strange. According to the infographic, from adversity, we gain distance and perspective. I believe it's like seeing things from different and wider angles, some of which are a happier view than others, and that having been through adversity gives us the ability to calm down and choose from a range of angles that never seemed to be there before. There is almost always a better picture I guess, just whether or not we choose to see it.

[In cases where there is no better picture, bitching is catharsis.]

The friends, fun, fatigue, and everything. I'm grateful for all that I've got to experience this year, that's all.

Special mention to the rapeseed fields. When the countryside is coloured in the brightest yellow you can find in a Faber Castell set, you know that spring is really here. And whatever may be on mind (usually revision) I can't help but marvel.

On a path between the villages of Breedon on the Hill and Melbourne.

In the skies above Cranfield, probably in the midst of a dutch roll.